Question:
Almondjoy,
Although you are concerned for you niece, please don't think that everyone diagnosed with schizophrenia are violent. They are not. And i highly suggest that you read up on it, if you haven't already, but i am sure that you have. Also, as another poster mentioned, "schizophrenia" is the disorder that he has, he should not be referred to always as "the schizophrenic", it is a label that can be very detrimental. If he is on medication, and has treated your niece well, you should not have anything to worry about. Many people have disorders that are kept in check by medication, and if they would not let you know about them, you would never know that they were not "normal" (whatever normal is nowadays). I have 2 family members diagnosed with schizophrenia, and you would never know that they suffered from this disease. One of them has not had an "episode" in over 20 yrs. He does not even need to be on medication anymore, for the last 15 yrs.
Although schizophrenia does sound scary, once you know about it, it becomes less scary. Many are able to live full lives with no episodes. Also, not all of them are violent, and even if they have been once, that is not precedent for how they will act in the future...mitigating factors may have influenced their behaviours. Do not judge him by his disorder, he is still a person.
I agree with you when you mentioned that your niece is too young to get married...18 is very young. But, all you can do is be there to support her. Because we all know, that if someone doesn't want us to do something, and they keep "nagging" (for lack of a better word...no offense intended)...that we are all rebellious by nature, and she will just turn around and do it behind everyone's back.
Again, i want to reiterate that not all those diagnosed with such a severe disorder are violent, and if he is on medication and gets counselling, he will be able to live a happy life.
I have done alot of research on schizophrenia, as well as written papers about this disorder, and although i do know what i am talking about, i am by no means an expert. Your concerns about this disorder should be discussed with a doctor, they will be able to help you alot as well.
Take care
Answer:
my advice would be to try and forget he has a mental illnes and concentrate on the man himself, do you like him? but as a man not as a schizophrenic. also 18 is not too young to be married if she is ready and only she knows that i think you should have more faith in your niece and dont be fooled by the medias stigma of schizophrenics they can be lovely people. i hope your niece a happy marriage and a great wedding day xxx
Answer:
Update:
My niece broke up with the boyfriend. She said he was too much work and he exhausted her. She felt like his caregiver, not girlfriend.
Answer:
one fourth of people with schizophrenia have one episode and never have another. One fourth live good lives on medications. One fourth are disabled and on medications and the last one fourth are institutionalized. So even schitzophrenics come in different sizes, with different degrees of disability. Which type she marries makes a difference.
Answer:
Thanks for the replies.
My niece is 18....too young to get married! The boy/man is 22. He does take his medicne. I think he was violent at one time, but I do not know the details...but he has not been violent with my niece.
The term "schizophrenic" just sounds so horrible. I know years ago people with mental illness and mental problems were hidden away and kept a secret, due to shame. Maybe that's why my family is so concerned about the boy, being a schizophrenic....based on what little knowledge of mental illness they have.
"Schizophrenics are strange and dangerous people", said my sister.
OK well I have to say that's a pretty offensive comment your sister made. I think she must have a very limited knowledge of people with mental health problems. I'm certainly not a dangerous person, far from it. This plain ignorance is what makes it difficult for others to be open about their health issues without being chastised. Yes the word schizophrenia is not a nice word, but why dont you take the time to get to know the person rather than getting hang up on a word. There may be issues you as a family need to talk about, but really I don't see schizophrenia any different to an illness like epilepsy or diabetes, we're all human and unfortunately God didn't make us perfect.